I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Someone signed my nipple.
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