she looked like the before picture.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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