I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
no, he came in my armpit
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
