Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
