ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
