I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize