...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
