did you get engaged???
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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