We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
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