i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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