Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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