She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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