I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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