i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize
