They should really pass out barf bags in church
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize