i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
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