why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
there is glitter all over my balls
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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