but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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