its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
