so explain again why im purple
no
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
