Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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