Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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