bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
