So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I need a hoe opinion
go on
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
