Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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