We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
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