Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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