And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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