okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Please don't give away my fajitas
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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