Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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