Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Randomize