At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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