ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
