She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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