My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
