He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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