I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
