i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
This toilet bowl is my home.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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