Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
