so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
