is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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