Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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