toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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