stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
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