Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
