im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
