Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
