Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
