I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize