I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
