There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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